Friday, January 2, 2009

2009, New Beginnings, Your Song

2008 left and 2009 came without much celebration or fanfare. Like what some of my friends mentioned, "It's like 2009 did not come!". What is the significance in a date? It's just a mode of reference, like time, after all. But it is what we do during these special dates and times which make such dates and times special, no? Maybe we are mostly caught up in the hub bub of life that we only take note and take stock of our lives when such significant dates draw near.

Honestly, I am not looking forward to 2009 and "Happy 2009" actually sounds perfunctory to me, with the economic recession looming over us and unrest happening all over the world. 2009 will also be a year full of changes and important decisions to be made for me, by me. Ended 2008 with a sense of closure, which brought to mind wat BFF C mentioned at the start of the year "Hey gal, I dun have a good feeling abt 2008." Not to jinx it or anything, but sometimes we just get a feeling about such stuff? Kinda inexplicable but nonetheless there you go.

2008 was a roller coaster year for myself, a year where gains and losses featured prominently in almost every area, more highs than low in my career and I hope to use this to motivate myself in 2009. To reach greater heights. Already I have a couple of projects lined up, both research-wise and the new sem's abt to begin. In other areas, it was crazy times but I managed to pull through, thanks to a great bunch of friends n family. Some friends apologised abt not being there enough for me, but I think that there are some stuff which we have to deal with alone, and what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger. And I've learnt tt I'm stronger than I know. Ha.

Looking ahead, for 2009, I can't say tt I'm looking forward to this year, or even anticipating much. A lot for me will have to be played by ear. While I prayed for a good year for myself and my loved ones on New Year's Day before I turned in, I also asked for courage to face challenges, tenacity, as well as wisdom to know what to pursue and what to let go, as per the conversation S and I had this morning. Ha. And of course, good health, a must for me, something I learnt as well in the past year... no fun being ill during the semester! With this in mind, I deleted all traces of the ex from every aspect of my life (wonders of new media!)- some things shld just remain in the past (though I need help in trying to delete email folders!). No more entertaining nonsense in 2009. Just delete, delete, delete.

However challenging though, life still goes on and I look forward to my daily dose of F.R.I.E.N.D.S, friends who inspire me and my family who supports me. Dr M says tt I need to have more fun and have fun exploring new avenues, will try to see how I can incorporate tt as well... maybe another trip? Ha. Coincidentally, my mum's a gd travel kaki besides my pals, but she's bogged down with lil tykes now. So I might just have to pursue other interests... Maybe more cooking sessions @ M's place? Just had dinner cooked by him last night and it was divine... V can attest to that as well... chicken soup for the soul. Or I can seek alone time with my literary interests and films? Am at the second last volume of the Sandman... riveting read and yesterday and today, I received recommendations to read some more of his books! V recommended Neverwhere, which seems interesting and B mentioned this quote to me from NG himself during our conversation this morning. B has lotsa interesting ideas and he's a really gd photographer. Too bad he requested tt his pics be private but I think that sometimes it's good to restrict circulation of good stuff!

Here's the NG quote he recommended.
"Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build this whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life... You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They do something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should just be friends' or 'how very perceptive' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-out-you-apart pain. I hate love." -- Neil Gaiman

To end on a positive note, YY sent me my horoscope for this month... I am selective abt such things, I only believe the gd stuff! Ha. So I'm glad with my lot for this month. Spot of travelling perhaps? :)

Pris had a song for 2008... I think tt 2008 was a crazy year for me, and too crazy to sum it up in a song. But I've a song to kickstart 2009, partly inspired by YY who got me thinking about Moulin Rouge... again!

*Note: Video begins with some loud moaning from Nicole Kidman's character, you might want to turn ur speakers down first. Ha.*


Your Song - Ewan McGregor
My gift is my song
And this one's for you
And you can tell everybody
That this is your song
It maybe quite simple
But now that it's done
Hope you don't mind
I hope you don't mind
That I put down in words
How wonderful life is now you're in the world

Sat on the roof
And I kicked off the moss
Well some of the verses well
They got me quite cross
But the sun's been kind
While I wrote this song
It's for people like you that
Keep it turned on

So excuse me for forgetting
But these things I do
You see I've forgotten
If they're green or they're blue
Anyway the thing is well I really mean
Yours are the sweetest eyes I've ever seen

[Allesandro- opera]

And you can tell everybody
This is your song
It may be quite simple
But now that it's done
I hope you don't mind
I hope you don't mind that I put down in words

How wonderful life is now you're in the world
I hope you don't mind
I hope you don't mind that I put down in words
How wonderful life is now you're in the world