Monday, February 23, 2009

“If a guy treats you like he doesn’t give a s---, it’s because he doesn’t give a s---.”



Decided on an evening of mindless entertainment to round off my week and to encourage myself for working over the weekend and missing a friend's wedding. It's just been one of those weeks of endless bad news so why not end the week on a light note? Chick flicks are one of my guilty pleasures and I've not had time to read anything other than my own research and readings.

I first noticed "He's Just Not That Into You" in Sex and the City, where the gals were trying to figure out why seemingly decent guys behave in such odd ways after their dates, like not calling when they said they would and not following up, etc. The conclusion: He's just not that into you. Which implies that we gals have to change our mindsets when it comes to relationships and dating. To stop making excuses for the guys (to make us feel better temporarily) and just accept that there are guys who are just not that into us, no matter how fabulous, how pretty and how witty or intelligent we are. And this sets the premise for the movie, which revolved around four inter-connected relationships, ala Love Actually.

I shan't give away spoilers for this movie, just that I think there will be parts of the movie which we can all relate to, guy or gal. I was seated in between a guy and a gal and I could totally observe their reactions, as well as my own, which was pretty interesting as evinced by the reactions of the rest in the theatre, the self-admission guilty laughs and this particular guy who sniggered loudly during certain scenes and provided some comic relief. Though I did relate to some of what the characters went through,the main protagonist, Gigi, whom I felt was borderline-stalkerish, did make some pretty accurate observations. One that I esp liked was how most gals hear stories from friends and this gives them hope when they are in bad relationships that they will end up like the exceptions they hear about when really, more often than not, we should take ourselves as the rule rather than the exception, even though we might be exceptional ladies.

There are little nuggets of astute insights though the movie does end predictably, like any chick flick or the chick lit which the movie was based on. I am glad that for myself, my friends and family already know how involved I get in my relationships and are usually the ones providing words of caution so that I won't be left hurting too much when a relationship has run its course.

Helps too that the cast was made up of some eye candy: for the guys there's Scarlett Johansson though I prefer Jennifer Anniston's character - Beth. ;) Had friends telling me that I seem more like the guys in the movie somehow... go watch and drop me a line if you agree! :)

Some of my fav quotes from the movie(from imdb.com):

Gigi: A girl will never forget the first boy she ever likes.
--------------------

Gigi
: We are all programmed to believe that if a guy acts like a total jerk that means he likes you.
----------------------

Beth: I just need you to stop being nice to me unless you are gonna marry me.
----------------------

Beth:
Am I... will I be Al Pacino in this scenario?
----------------------

Gigi:
How stupid is it that a girl has to wait for a guy's call anyway, right?
-----------------------
Mary
: I had this guy leave me a voicemail at work, so I called him at home, and then he emailed me to my BlackBerry, and so I texted to his cell, and now you just have to go around checking all these different portals just to get rejected by seven different technologies. It's exhausting.
-------------------------------
Gigi:
I would rather be like that, then be like you.
Alex:
Excuse me? What's that supposed to mean?
Gigi:
I may dissect each little thing and put myself out there so much but at least that means that I still care. Oh! You've think you won because women are expendable to you. You may not get hurt or make an ass of yourself that way but you don't fall in love that way either. You have not won. You're alone. I may do a lot of stupid shit but I'm still a lot closer to love than you are.
-------------------------------

Mary: He MySpaced me.
Nathan
: Ouch!
Mary:
Oh.
Joshua:
Oh girl I don't know about that... My trampy little sister says MySpace is the new booty call.
--------------------------------

Gigi:
I think I've figured it out. Remember when I went out with that notary public and he cheated on me and then Anastasia from upstairs told me about how her boyfriend cheated on her in the beginning then he totally changed and now they're married and crazy in love?
Beth
: I thought that guy was a process server.
Gigi:
No notary. Anyway my point is, Anastasia is the exception, not the rule. We have to stop listening to these stories because they rule is most guys who cheat on you up front don't really care about you very much.
Janine:
Ok.
Gigi: Ok, Ok. Exhibit A. Chad the drummer who lived in a storage space. He only used me for rides and yet I continued to stalk him for most of 1998. Then oh, um, there was Don, that broke up with me every Friday so that he could have his weekends free. I was delusional about that relationship. I used to refer to him as my husband to random people, like my dental hygienist. Anyway, all my friends used to tell me about how things might work out with these dipsticks because they knew someone, who knew someone, who dated a dipstick just like mine. That girl ended up getting married and living happily ever after. That the exception and we're not the exception we're the rule.
----------------------------

Alex: If a guy treats you like he doesn't give a sh*t, it's because he doesn't give a sh*t.
----------------------------
Alex: An excuse is a polite rejection. Men are not afraid of "ruining the friendship."
-----------------------------
Alex:
If you can find him, then he can find you. If he wants to find you, he will.
------------------------------
Alex: Men don't forget how much they like you, so put down the phone.
------------------------------
Alex:
You are good enough to be asked out.
Gigi:
Maybe his grandma died or maybe he lost my number or is out of town or got hit by a cab...
Alex:
Or maybe he is not interested in seeing you again.
-------------------------------

Gigi:
Hey sorry to bug you again! Uh quick question.
Alex:
What's going on?
Gigi:
Ok I'm making out with this guy, PG stuff. but he mentions he's going out of town so he's gonna be out of touch.
Alex:
Run.
Gigi:
But maybe he is going out of town.
Alex:
To where? New Guinea? Where's he gonna be that he's gonna be out of touch?
Gigi: Opens bathroom door - Where are you going out of town to again?
Gigi:
Pittsburgh
Alex
: Run.
Gigi:
So what now I'm just supposed to turn from every guy who doesn't like me?
Alex:
Uh. Yeah!
Gigi: There's not gonna be anybody left.

Alex
: If a guy doesn't call you, he doesn't want to call you.

----------------------------
Gigi:
Girls are taught a lot of stuff growing up. If a guy punches you he likes you. Never try to trim your own bangs and someday you will meet a wonderful guy and get your very own happy ending. Every movie we see, Every story we're told implores us to wait for it, the third act twist, the unexpected declaration of love, the exception to the rule. But sometimes we're so focused on finding our happy ending we don't learn how to read the signs. How to tell from the ones who want us and the ones who don't, the ones who will stay and the ones who will leave. And maybe a happy ending doesn't include a guy, maybe... it's you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future. Maybe the happy ending is... just... moving on. Or maybe the happy ending is this, knowing after all the unreturned phone calls, broken-hearts, through the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment you never gave up hope.

My fav song from the OST

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Slumdog's the Dawg! :: Paper Planes.

This week has been so crazy with a packed V Day weekend (information on that privy to close friends and family only!). Suffice to say that I got a new baby - the gadget I've been lusting for since forever - in my fav colour! :) I began my week hitting the ground running for my thesis re-writes and work - I was amazed that I could make time for the movie, was q reluctant coz I wanted to work but work-life (or a farce of a life outside work, ha) balance MnM!

I mentioned to C that I might not be able to stay awake for the movie, having spent hours working on my thesis till the wee hours of Tues morning. But boy was I wrong! I entered the packed theatre with anticipation and spent the next two hours throughly entertained! C n S were as well! Slumdog Millionaire is by far one of the best movies I've watched. It has everything in it, life, love, loss, poverty, betrayal, redemption, luck, etc., which are the ingredients of an entertaining plot but add in the magic of Danny Boyle, and you have a winning formula.

*Spoilers ahead!*

Slumdog could have ended up being a melodramatic film or an angsty one, given that the backdrop for most of the film is featured in the slums. But while the stark poverty of the life as a child in the slum is present, joie de vivre is also present throughout the film and I think that this contributes a lot to how the movie has been accepted and embraced by the audience. I was touched to see kids playing on the airfield beside the slums, clothes all tattered and torn but having a ball of a time, literally. Even as the protagonist Jamal travels around India with his brother Salim, we can see the comadarie between siblings who are so different. The movie has a series of contrasts and even though it may not portray India in the best of light, we find it difficult to pass judgement on the boys as they steal, hitchhike and make their way around the best they can. Just no new shoes when visiting the Taj Mahal maybe.

For myself, the theme of hope stands out the most and I think hope is something that we can all do a little with these days. Jamal's hope of getting reunited with Latika, Salim's hope of a better life with more money, Latika's hope of getting together with Jamal for good, reminds me that hope is a precious thing to hold on to. And like the movie, sometimes we get what we hope for, sometimes we get what we hope for and then regret it and sometimes we just don't get what we hope for at all. Such is life. But we all need hope.

Besides the engaging storyline, laced with bittersweet irony as Jamal related for most of the movie how he got all the answers on the Indian version of Who wants to be a Millionaire correct. As it turns out, he got the answers (and the money) because of the lasting traumatic memories in his life and that he wasn't interested in the money to begin with but joined the show because he hopes the love of his life will watch the show and know that he is there waiting for her. The earnest Jamal, coupled with his streetkid attitude makes for a heartfelt performance as he related the tale of his life and reason as to why he joined the gameshow.

I came out of the theatre feeling... good! Not for the squalid living conditions of the kids in the slums, but glad that some stories have a happy ending. Btw, I totally enjoyed the OST for Slumdog Millionaire as well and the dance sequence at the end! :)




My fav song from the OST of Slumdog Millionaire

Paper Planes - M.I.A

[x2]
I fly like paper, get high like planes
If you catch me at the border I got visas in my name
If you come around here, I make 'em all day
I get one down in a second if you wait

[x2]
Sometimes I think sitting on trains
Every stop I get to I'm clocking that game
Everyone's a winner now we're making that fame
Bonafide hustler making my name

[x4]
All I wanna do is (BANG BANG BANG BANG!)
And (KKKAAAA CHING!)
And take your money

[x2]
Pirate skulls and bones
Sticks and stones and weed and bongs
Running when we hit 'em
Lethal poison through their system

[x2]
No one on the corner has swagger like us
Hit me on my Burner prepaid wireless
We pack and deliver like UPS trucks
Already going hell just pumping that gas

[x4]
All I wanna do is (BANG BANG BANG BANG!)
And (KKKAAAA CHING!)
And take your money

M.I.A.
Third world democracy
Yeah, I got more records than the K.G.B.
So, uh, no funny business

Some some some I some I murder
Some I some I let go
Some some some I some I murder
Some I some I let go

Friday, February 13, 2009

V Day is dead! :: Kiss the Girl

Have I mentioned that the level below my office which I have to pass by everyday has been V Day hell for the last two weeks and this week esp? While I applaud the entrepreneurial spirit of the students, part of me rolls my eyes and scurries along when I see the dangling red hearts and the heart-shaped arch on my way to the canteen.

While I love pressies and thoughtful gifts, I feel that V Day capitalises on the idea of romantic love and therefore me and my pals have decided to label 14 Feb "V Day is dead!" for the last couple of years. And I read with a certain amount of sagely nods articles about how Love is a chemical reaction in the brain which increases stress in men and women and also how V Day is actually a stressful time for couples. From my own experience, I have to agree with this obsrvation.

Anyway, this week has been an insanely busy week for me with team formations and thesis re-writes (again but am learning what I need to do so that's good!) and the first exam for the module. Which means Round 1 of grading and consolidation of grades. Where got time to think about V Day and what to do? But it's Fri (the 13th... do I sense some irony in this?) and time is slowly but surely running out and I'm stumped! What to do and what to get for JR? Without causing him bodily hurt (cooking for him or baking something is out of the question then) or getting him something that he needs/wants (Even I don't know what I need to get for myself given my own busy schedule!). Grrr.

So while I ponder on this, I think that V Day should be extended to not just romantic love, but also the love that exists in friendships, etc. So Happy V Day everyone! Be glad and enjoy the occassion if you are in a relationship but gather your friends and have a good time even if you are not in one. Or take the chance to ask that special person out if you have someone in mind... a Filipino colleague just shared with me how in the Philippines, there are university groups who will do live music dedications to girls at the request of guys who are interested in them but have yet to indicate their love professions... cool!



Kiss the girl - Colbie Caillat

There you see her
Sitting there across the way
She don’t got a lot to say
But there’s something about her
And you don’t know why
But you’re dying to try
You wanna kiss the girl

Yes, you want her
Look at her, you know you do
It’s possible she wants you, too
There is one way to ask her
It don’t take a word
Not a single word
Go on and kiss the girl

Sing with me now
Sha-la-la-la-la-la
My, oh, my
Look at the boy too shy
He ain’t gonna kiss the girl
Sha-la-la-la-la-la
Ain’t that sad
Ain’t it shame, too bad
You gonna miss the girl

Now’s your moment
Floating in a blue lagoon
Boy, you better do it soon
No time will be better
She don’t say a word
And she won’t say a word
Until you kiss the girl

Sha-la-la-la-la-la
Don’t be scared
You got the mood prepared
Go on and kiss the girl
Sha-la-la-la-la-la
Don’t stop now
Don’t try to hide it how
You wanna kiss the girl
Sha-la-la-la-la-la
Float along
Listen to the song
The song say kiss the girl
Sha-la-la-la-la-la
Music play
Do what the music say
You wanna kiss the girl

You’ve got to kiss the girl
Why don’t you kiss the girl
You gotta kiss the girl
Go on and kiss the girl

Monday, February 9, 2009

It's nice to know...

The meaning of "tempest" in thefreedictionary.com was stated as "1. A violent windstorm, frequently accompanied by rain, snow, or hail. 2. Furious agitation, commotion, or tumult; an uproar." Which is a pretty apt way of describing my life for 2009 thus far, and it' s only been Jan!

The past week was also filled with work stuff with the first week of tutorials, as well as embarking on thesis feedback and rewrites. Had to think through a lot of stuff and was also dealt with a disappointment on a weekend. Took some time out, gained some perspectives and I'm back with renewed faith and drive.
Think the following sums up the people I have which I shld be thankful for. A list for me to refer to when life could be better.

A Nice To Know... list.


1) It's nice to know that I have someone whom I can go back and get a bear hug from, no words or questions. Just a big, comforting, reassuring hug.


2) It's nice to know that I have someone who will be there for me no matter what happens in the next two months.

3) It's nice to know that I have one more someone for whom I want to better myself for.

4) It's nice to know that I have one more reason to wake up and make the best out of my day.

5) It's nice to know that I have someone to hook little fingers with.

6) It's nice to know that I've someone to tell me to be upfront and tell my guy that I need him when I need him instead of trying to be headstrong.


7) It's nice to know that I've someone-s to msg when I receive bad news and whom will call to check if I need to talk.


8) It's nice to know that I've someone who will keep waking up in the middle of the night when I've had a rough night to check if I'm alright, even if he's super tired.


A big thank you to A, S, C, and esp JR. I spent the whole week drained only to realise the difference 24 hrs can make. Love you.


And Happy Yuan Xiao Jie... which officially marks the end of the Lunar New Year celebration!






So Nice - Bebel Gilberto

Someone to hold me tight
That would be very nice
Someone to love me right
That would be very nice
Someone to understand
Each little dream in me
Someone to take my hand
And be a team with me

So nice, life would be so nice
If one day I'd find
Someone who would take my hand
And samba through life with me

Someone to cling to me
Stay with me right or wrong
Someone to sing to me
Some little samba song
Someone to take my heart
And give his heart to me
Someone who's ready to
Give love a start with me

Oh yeah, that would be so nice
I could see you and me, that would be nice

Someone to hold me tight
That would be very nice
Someone to love me right
That would be very nice
Someone to understand
Each little dream in me
Someone to take my hand
To be a team with me
So nice, life would be so nice
If one day I'd find
Someone who would take my hand
And samba through life with me

Someone to cling to me
Stay with me right or wrong
Someone to sing to me
Some little samba song
Someone to take my heart
And give his heart to me
Someone who's ready to
Give love a start with me

Oh yes, that would be so nice
Shouldn't we, you and me?
I can see it will be nice...

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Here's one for the guys - the nice ones esp!

A friend forwarded this to me today, and he added that I "should include stuff on guys besides girly ruminations!". Ha. Fine. Lotsa stuff happening, with tutorials beginning - hiccups and student appeals and requests. Work front, thesis front, so much decisions, so little time! But being in a constant flurry of activity suits me, esp when coupled with intellectual pursuits.

Anyways, here's one for the guys, the nice ones esp... and I know I've got lotsa nice guy friends! :)

P.s: I've amended some portions which I think are not true (at least not to me!)

"This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point.

This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores.

This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it.

This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor.

This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’e nice like that.

The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile.

For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming."

I'm posting this song as I heard it twice today - once before I headed out to school and another time when I got back... from totally different sources! Given that this song is a couple of years old, I'd say tt's a pretty good coincidence - enjoy! :)



The Reason - Hoobastank
I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found out a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
Thats why i need you to hear

I've found out a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is You

and the reason is You [x3]

I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found out a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you